Even if someone’s speculation/prediction is close or even dead on to what you have planned, you should have the confidence in yourself to deliver at that point.
That’s just my opinion though.
I’ve seen first hand on here how subversion of expectations can kill a great story.
Go with your gut though.
You ARE an amazing writer, and I have faith you can work with anything.
You have masterfully maintained the tease to perfection, and I fully believe the payoff will be epic.
As I’ve stated, your implementation of the time limit was a fantastic tool.
There’s only so much more that CAN happen within that time limit.
The fact that every chapter has left me wanting more is a testament to your writing.
All I’m saying is, as long as you maintain the quality you’ve delivered so far, all you have to do is put the last few pieces in place, then step back and admire the picture
And I’m sorry if I’ve put unnecessary pressure on you, but this story really IS incredible and IS my current favorite
Last edited by NudeBaG on Fri Feb 07, 2025 7:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I understand the comment about having people suggest something close to what you had planned.
It may not be logical, but there is a part of you that thinks about whether that person would think you did it because of their suggestion, and i would imagine, when it is in the open, like the comments on this forum, it would be worse, as others might think the same.
Not a massive thing, but definitely something that can cross your mind.
Kind of glad, when i posted on Nifty, that all comments and feeback was emails. i am not sure if a live and public comment section, would have been a good thing or not for me at the time.
I actually tend to not comment much myself on stories, in case it comes across as trying to take over the story, or if i suggest something already in the works, plus, i ramble, and often confuse myself with the point i am trying to make
Another aspect of this story in particular that tends to get overlooked a lot in these kinds of stories is your depiction of relationships between characters.
Like, I know it’s an ENM story, and Cam IS a bit careless (in more ways than one) AND I DESPERATELY want him to be further embarrassed in front of the girls, but I also ‘kind of’ hope Ellie, Hannah and Mia are a bit surprised
Like, the budding relationship with Ellie has been masterfully crafted in a short time.
She CLEARLY cares for him, and given any other set of circumstances, this could be just a normal day at the pool where their budding relationship evolves and they get closer.
But now, thanks to jealousy, hormones, sibling rivalry, classmate rivalry, revenge and every other conflict that comes at that age, Cam has lived up to Hannah and Mia’s view of him as ‘a stupid boy’.
Even when given the chance to make it up to Ellie, he couldn’t do something that (may have) endeared him to her further.
Now, it seems he’ll be exposed to her WITHOUT the safety net of compassion that was there before.
Again, masterfully crafted relationships in a very short time.
I rambled a bit there, but my point was to further praise your writing abilities
Freesub wrote: Fri Feb 07, 2025 9:01 am
Though I must say, I think Hannah also deserves some exposure
By the end of this story, Hannah will not have had everything go her own way. I have something planned for her. I'll say no more than that.
Summers wrote: Fri Feb 07, 2025 9:59 am
I've enjoyed the story, and like that the story seems to have come full circle, with them returning to the changing cubicle.
I am glad that you seemed to have stuck with your own storyline, while likely taking a few ideas and advice on board.
It is so easy to stray from your own ideas and plan, when people are offering their own ideas and preferences, and end up struggling to finish the story, as it doesn't quite feel like what you had in mind from the start.
I would love to write my own story on here, but i struggle to take an idea, and actually write the story. i get too distracted, and tend to ramble on in my writing, so what could easily be a story that lasts a few chapters, it turns into an out of control entity with no end in sight
I've only managed to ever write one complete story, and it was insanely long.
Anyway (see i can't help myself, i ramble, lol) good story, and thank you for sharing.
Thanks. I always had a clear plan in my head to start small in a changing cubicle, go big and crazy in the middle, then bring it back to small and personal in a cubicle at the end. However, the story has definitely grown in the telling!
To be honest, I find it more of a struggle when people post something very close to what I already have planned, than when they suggest something completely different. I sort of think it won't be a surprise anymore, or it'll look like I've lifted their idea. But I force myself to get over that. I've deliberately set up and foreshadowed so much stuff that it's inevitable some of the speculation will be pretty close to the mark.
Good luck if you do write something again!
I think the speculation's accuracy is more so down to your hints and the people's experience in reading stories, so I think you are correct in not worrying about whether it will look like you have lifted their idea
NudeBaG wrote: Sat Feb 08, 2025 2:33 pm
Part 10 cumming soon, I hope
Given the current rate of one chapter every four days we’ve had so far, the single most anticipated release (pun intended) of 2025 should be coming tomorrow!
Sorry folks, my available writing time has somewhat run away from me this weekend. I won't be posting Part 10 today, but I PROMISE I will post it tomorrow.
Don't go thinking it's all about to reach a climax (ahem) tomorrow though. Part 10 is not the final part. You know how I like to drag these moments out.
As disappointing as this is, I can’t complain too much.
I’d rather you take your time on it anyway, just building more anticipation
If it helps to maintain the phenomenal quality of the story, that’s fine by me
I’ll just tease myself by reading it over again
I’m also in a tough spot.
I’m desperately trying to get back to Magic, but I wrote SO MUCH that I now have to go back through the entire story while rebuilding my ‘story bible’.
As much as I want to just rush through it, I can’t.
I don’t want to forget or ignore any important stuff I planted in previous chapters.
While I recently rushed the endings of some of my recent stories, I can’t do that to Magic.
All that to say, I respect you at least letting us know about the delay, and this is still my current favorite story here
“This is my first attempt at writing this kind of fiction. Feedback welcome. It’s not likely to be the most original story ever, but let’s see how it goes!”
Just realized that this is how this story started…
Not to continue beating a dead horse, but you have done a PHENOMENAL job for this being your first attempt at this
This was a whole new level of problem for Cameron. At least in the pool there hadn’t been any phones around. “Stop that!” he demanded, indignant at Mia’s intrusion. He reached up to try to block the camera lens and grab Mia’s phone from her hand, taking care to keep one hand over his genitals as he did.
Mia smirked as she stood looking down on her stark naked classmate and the hand that was barely maintaining his modesty. “Not a chance,” she said, snapping her hand up, out of his reach and over the barrier between their two cubicles. “Hey El, check out your nudie boyfriend.” Mia passed the phone down to Ellie, who was sat on the bench of their cubicle beside where Mia was stood.
“What?” Cameron exclaimed. “Ellie’s with you too?” Then, “Ellie, stop! Please don’t look at those pics!” But Ellie was done with passing up chances to see her crush in the buff. Getting dressed could wait. She looked eagerly at the screen to study the images Mia had captured.
Ellie and Mia had started changing while they had time to kill, waiting for Cam to show up. Their plan only relied on Hannah remaining in her swimsuit (otherwise Cam would never agree to share a cubicle with her again). Mia in particular had been keen to get out of her mismatched, improvised bikini, incorporating a pair of badly-fitting boy's swimming trunks as it did. She also figured it would be even more embarrassing for Cam if they were fully dressed when they witnessed his bareness. So Mia had got back into her street clothes of a “Chicks rule!” t-shirt and denim miniskirt.
Ellie had been slower to get changed. She had only got so far as drying and removing her bikini top by the time Cameron arrived and she'd swiped his shorts from under the barrier. Her state of undress was the same as when she'd been ambushed in the pool earlier. It meant she couldn’t risk climbing up with Mia, but she was enjoying zooming in on her friend’s photos. Mia loved the way her friend could just sit there, casually half naked, distracted by the phone. “You can only see his face in the second one,” Ellie remarked, “but the first one’s a much clearer shot of his backside. Hey, look, if you zoom in, you can even make out his bumhole!”
Cameron was mortified to hear this through the cubicle wall. “No! Ellie, please delete them!” he called back, now trying to grab his towel back from Hannah while maintaining his cover. She quickly threw it past Cameron and up to Mia, who caught it. Sensing his towel was about to disappear the same way as Mia’s phone, Cameron jumped up on the bench to grab it.
With one hand guarding his privates, he only narrowly avoided losing his balance (and his tiny amount of cover), but he managed it. His bum was now right up in Hannah’s face. “Ew,” she joked, “I did NOT need to see that!” Cameron ignored her and carried on his tug of war for the towel. With one arm versus two, however, he didn’t stand a chance. Mia pulled the towel away from him and dropped it into the cubicle below her. Then she grabbed Cameron's wrist tightly with both her hands. He tried to pull free but she held him tight.
He tried to look left and right past Mia's head and down into the cubicle below her, to beg Ellie for help. Mia swayed from side-to-side in concert with him, blocking his view. “Oh no, you don’t, Cam,” she scolded. “Naughty boy, trying to get another peek at El when she’s topless in here.” If Cameron hadn’t been in such a desperate situation, that kind of revelation might’ve caused him to instantly become erect. As it was, he felt a tingle in his dick as Mia continued wickedly, “Her other boob looks just as good as the one you saw, by the way. Just thought you should know.”
Ellie put the phone down and slapped her friend's thigh. “MIA!” she cried in mock outrage. Ellie reached for her bra, deciding she’d better get dressed if she didn’t want to miss out on the naked show in the cubicle next door. Mia meanwhile, maintained her vice-like grip on Cameron’s arm. She called down to Hannah, “What are you waiting for? Pull his other arm away!”
Needing no further encouragement, Hannah tried to do just that. Cameron now stood high on the bench, tugging against Mia’s grip on one arm and Hannah’s grip on the other. Both girls’ gazes were fixed on his crotch, which was at Hannah’s eye level and which she was about to uncover. Cameron decided to cut his losses before he became exposed full frontal to both of them. He jumped down from the bench, using his whole body weight to pull himself out of Mia’s grasp. He turned his body towards Hannah as he fell, hoping to create enough slack in the arm she held so that she wouldn’t pull his hand away from his privates as he descended.
It almost work. He broke free of Mia, but Hannah succeeded in pulling his hand free of his groin. For the second time, she saw everything. This time, his dick and balls were almost at her eye level, flopping about with the motion of his fall. Hannah laughed at the comical sight. Cameron’s face burned at this repeat exposure. The only saving grace was his back was to Mia, so at least she hadn’t seen what Hannah had. He quickly covered himself up again.
Without pausing for breath, he grabbed Hannah’s towel from where she had wrapped it around her chest and pulled it off her. He was running out of other items to cover himself with. Hannah still had her swimsuit on underneath, so wasn't exposed by his action, but she fought Cameron for the towel nonetheless. “Give me that, Han,” he pleaded. “I need it more than you do!”
Hannah looked scornfully at her naked stepbrother. “I don’t think you do,” she told him. “YOU don’t have anything left to hide that I haven’t already seen. Twice,” she added, rubbing it in. “Whereas I still have everything important to keep a nasty boy like you from seeing.”
While the two stepsiblings were squabbling, Mia climbed back down inside her own cubicle. “Hurry up, she told Ellie. “I’m going next door!” Mia opened the cubicle door without warning and dashed out. Ellie yelped and quickly crossed her arms across her bra-covered chest, in case any boys happened to be passing outside, but the coast was clear. Mia knocked on the door of Hannah and Cameron’s cubicle. Still trying to cover himself while fighting for the one remaining towel, Cameron was unable to prevent Hannah sliding the latch open.
He grew considerably more scared as Mia entered the private space of his and Hannah's cubicle. As a larger, family-sized changing cubicle, there was plenty of room for them all, but he was naked and he didn’t think he could fight off two girls at once. He couldn’t see how he was going to get out of this situation with what remained of his privacy intact.
With Hannah’s help, Mia successfully plucked the second towel away from Cameron's grasp and tossed it casually over the cubicle partition to join the first towel. Cameron was helpless to stop Mia and Hannah grabbing him under an elbow from each side and holding him facing the cubicle door, which now stood wide open. He knew the two girls were going to expose him. One quick pull from each of them and his arms would be tugged to the sides, baring him completely to them both and to anyone who happened to look in.
A couple of young adults, a man and a woman in their early twenties, were passing on their way out of the changing village, having finished swimming and gotten dressed back in their street clothes. Cameron called out to them in desperation, “Help me, please!” The young woman covered her mouth to stifle a laugh as she saw the teen boy, trapped between two girls, naked as the day he was born and struggling in their arms, with only his hands shielding his private parts.
The man looked too. On any other day, he might’ve helped the lad, but he was smarting from having just been caught naked himself by a crazy older woman looking into his cubicle while he was changing. Any sympathy he felt for Cameron was outweighed by the thought that why should HE be the only one to suffer embarrassment today? The young man shook his head and chuckled. “Sorry kid, you’re on your own.”
Mary had inadvertently doomed her son to exposure once again. She was no longer there to help Cameron either. She and Chris had finished dressing and were now leaving the pool through the reception area. Other people were leaving and arriving at the same time. “Oh, hi Natalie,” Mary said to a short, dark-haired girl who was on her way in. Natalie was the daughter of one of Mary’s neighbours, and was in the same class as Cameron at school. Mary had tried to encourage the two of them to be friends, but Cameron had shown no interest. The girl greeted Mary back as they passed. Then Mary and Chris left the building, unknowingly abandoning Cameron to his fate.
“C’mon Ellie, we’re waiting for you!” Mia called impatiently from the cubicle. “Just a sec,” came Ellie’s answer, as she scrambled into her top. She could change out of her bikini bottoms later. She left Mia’s phone on the bench but picked up her own, thumbing on the camera mode. If there were pics to be taken, she wanted them in her own gallery. Cameron was horrified as he saw Ellie appear in the open cubicle doorway, phone pointed at him. “Oh wow, nudie Cam!” she said, delighted. She was still annoyed with him, but that didn’t stop her admiring his body.
Ellie was wearing a purple crop top which made her modest breasts look larger and showed off the flat expanse of her midriff. Below that, she still had her navy-blue bikini bottoms on. A locker key still dangled from one of her wrists. Ellie’s state of being halfway through changing sent thoughts racing through Cameron’s mind. Even though she was decently covered, he never normally saw girls like this. He imagined watching Ellie change the rest of the way. His dick tingled again, but remained flaccid. He was too terrified for it to be anything else.
“Ellie, PLEASE,” he tried again. “I’m really sorry for what I did earlier, but this is too much! I really like you, and I hope you still like me. I saved you from Jack and Mark, so please can you make them stop?”
Ellie looked Cameron dead in the eyes. He could see pity there, but also hunger and determination. She was immune to his emotional blackmail. “In case you’ve forgotten, Cam, I saved YOU from Jack and Mark too. I’ve missed out on several chances today to see what you’re hiding down there. I’m not missing this one too. I gave you a chance to show me the easy way and you turned me down. I AM going to see your boy parts and that’s all there is to it.”
Cameron turned to Hannah instead. His privacy from her was already lost, given the full show he’d already accidentally given her twice now. He knew that, and he knew she would make his life a misery about it later. But for now, for possibly the first time since their parents had moved in together, he made a heartfelt appeal to her as a brother to a sister. “Hannie, please! We’re family! These girls are in my CLASS. I’ll be nicer to you. I’ll give you all my savings. Just please, please don’t let them see my dick!” Hannah shook her head firmly. “Sorry, Cam, but you’ve tried to see all three of us naked today. This is payback and you totally deserve it.”
Cameron looked finally at Mia, seeing the vindictive glee on her face. He didn’t even try throwing himself on her mercy. It was clear she had none for him.
Ellie stepped fully inside the cubicle and closed the door behind her. It was a little cramped, but there was enough room for the four of them to stand close together. Ellie slid the latch, sealing them inside. “Whenever you’re ready, ladies,” she said with mock politeness. “On three, then?” Hannah asked Mia. The other girl nodded. “One...” she began.
Cameron’s heart was racing. “No, don’t look! Please don’t look at me!” he cried. He continued to tug against the grip of the two girls holding him, but he knew it was futile. Together they were too strong for him. He felt like a condemned man. There was nothing he could do to escape this time. His crush, his enemy and his stepsister, the three girls in all the world he had most wanted to keep his private parts hidden from, were about to see it all. The game was up. “Two...” called Mia and Hannah together. One more second until his imminent exposure.
Cameron’s heart wasn’t the only one racing. With a cooler head, Ellie might’ve thought they were going too far, but she had given herself over to her lust, consumed by the prospect of finally seeing her crush’s boy parts. Mia too, was eager to get her own first clear look at what Cameron had fought so hard to keep secret, and rub his nose in his defeat. And while Hannah already knew what her stepbrother looked like down there, she was excited to share the sight and humiliate him further in front of two other girls.
“Three!” shouted the trio of girls in unison, with undisguised glee. And, just like that, it was done. Cameron felt the pit of his stomach drop away as the inevitable happened. Mia and Hannah each pulled one of his arms aside and there he was, fully on show at last. Totally exposed, bared, everything that marked him as a boy out in the open.
Cameron’s penis, soft from terror despite the sexually charged situation, flapped up and down and from side to side as he thrashed around wildly, struggling to break free from the girls. Below it, his balls hung low and bobbed around too. He was bigger than a child, but not yet a man. There was no hair anywhere and his genitals were not yet fully grown.
Hannah, at his side, was mesmerised by the sight, as she took in a much longer look at her stepbrother’s most shameful parts than she had been treated to previously. She took in all the details she hadn’t had chance to absorb before. She laughed at the way his bits bounced about, and at the expression of horror on Cam’s face. “We’re loooooking!” she taunted him, in mockery of his plea against them doing exactly that.
Mia, at Cam’s other side, was also delighted by her first unobstructed look at the whole of his penis. He was indeed totally hairless, as Hannah had told her. He was also, if not quite as tiny as she’d imagined, certainly not the owner of anything to be proud of. He was a naked boy, and therefore of interest to her, but she felt nothing but derision towards him. Ellie deserved much better than THIS.
Ellie, facing Cameron, felt her heart leap as his hands were first pulled away, but her anticipation immediately turned to confusion as she didn’t see what she had expected to see. Unlike Hannah, Ellie had more basis for comparison. The other 13-year-old boy she had seen that day had felt the need to stuff his trunks with a sock. She had somehow expected Cameron to be better endowed, but he was smaller and still bald. These parts of his body seemed to be lagging behind the rest of him in development. Ellie couldn’t hide the disappointment in her voice as she let out an “Oh!” causing Mia to glance at her in satisfaction.
Ellie felt as if Cameron had let her down somehow. It was silly of her, she chastised herself. He couldn’t help what he looked like. Now she understood why he had been so reluctant to let her see him. But even though she had expected more, this was still her boy, her Cameron, and that made the sight of his private parts something she would treasure. So what if he was a little small and undeveloped down there? Ellie was not so shallow as all that. She still felt affection for the boy, and he WAS cute in his birthday suit. She simply had to… adjust to this knew knowledge about him.
Cameron heard Ellie’s “Oh!” and it went through his heart like a dagger. How had he ever felt proud of his genitals? They felt so small and pathetic now. He couldn’t bring himself to look any of the girls in the eye. He was drowning in a panic such as he had never known. Something short-circuited inside his brain. “No! No! No! No! No! No! No!” he kept repeating.
Any remaining dignity Cameron might’ve salvaged from the situation was abandoned and forgotten. He tried to pull his arms free, tried to double over, tried to trap his genitals between his legs, all to no avail. Each move he made was countered by Mia and Hannah holding him tightly upright and in position. Every fibre of Cameron’s being was screaming with one desperate urge. Cover up! Cover up and stop them staring!
And stare they did, drinking it all in. “What’s the matter, Cam?” Mia teased him. “Are you embarrassed that we can all see your itty bitty willy?” Hannah laughed at Mia’s deliberate use of the childish name for his dick. “It is pretty little,” she agreed, not wanting to show her ignorance in front of these older girls. Besides, she wasn’t exactly minded to come to Cameron’s defence.
Ellie did, though. “It’s not THAT little,” she put in. Hannah considered this opinion. Mia rolled her eyes. Another part of Cameron’s self-esteem died inside. It was hardly the best reassurance Ellie could’ve given him. “Anyway,” Ellie continued, “keep your voices down. There are other people around. We could get in trouble.” Mia recognised the sense in this. Cameron did too. He opened his mouth to call for help again, but Mia silenced him. “That goes for you too, baldy boy, unless you want us to drag you out there and throw you in the pool!”
Natalie made her way through the busy changing village, looking for a free cubicle. She found one, but it was full of someone else’s stuff. Lots of people's stuff, apparently. Two bikini tops, a pair of boy’s swim shorts and a pair of boy’s swim trunks, what was that about? A towel lay piled on the floor, as if it had been thrown there. Three other towels lay on the bench. Surely two boys and two girls couldn’t have all been crammed in such a tight space, changing together, could they? Her mind boggled at the idea. Whatever the case, they had left now, without taking their things with them. It was the only spare cubicle and she could change around their things.
She went inside. Then she saw a phone lying on the bench. It’s owner definitely shouldn’t have left THAT there. Natalie pressed the power button to see if she could find a clue as to whose it was. The phone hadn’t locked. Whoever had left it couldn’t have been gone more than a couple of minutes. Then she gasped. A photo of someone NAKED filled the screen. She could see their bum. Was that a boy? He looked to be about her age. She scrolled and saw a second photo. This one showed the naked boy’s face. Oh my god, she thought, is that CAMERON?
Natalie heard noises and hushed voices from the cubicle next door. She stood on the bench to try to see over, but she was too short to see anything clearly. A group of four kids her age were huddled together. She thought she recognised a couple of the girls. Was the boy Cameron? They were blocking Natalie’s view of their faces and she couldn’t see what they were doing. She climbed back down and turned her attention back to the phone. She thought for a moment, opened the pictures again, and then forwarded them to her own phone, taking care to delete any trace of having done so.
In the cubicle next door to her, Ellie was also making use of her phone, which she still had pointed at Cameron. She had temporarily forgotten she was holding it in all the excitement of Cameron’s initial exposure, but now she remembered. It had been Mia’s ideas to take photos and Ellie had been unsure at first, but had gone along with it. Now her friend quizzed her about it. “How’s the Cam cam going?” Mia asked. “Have you got lots of good pics yet?”
Ellie frowned. “Not really,” she said. “His bouncing around makes it hard for the camera to focus. I took a few but they’re all blurred. It makes a great video though.” Cameron pulled with suddenly more force against his captors. “You’re VIDEOING this?” he asked in disbelief. “Yep,” Ellie told him, then looked at Mia. “Much better than a cat falling off a table!” Ellie giggled at their private joke from earlier that afternoon.
Cameron was tiring. He couldn’t keep thrashing around forever, and it was doing him no good. He stopped moving. Parts of him took a little longer to stop moving, the swing of his genitals gradually winding down to a standstill. Ellie held her phone up close to them and snapped another photo. “Much better!” she said, pleased at having captured the image of Cameron’s boy parts for posterity.
Cameron simply hung his head in silent dismay. A funny thought occurred to Hannah as she watched Ellie’s photography. “It’s a shame we don’t have a banana for scale!” she sniggered. Mia snorted back, but Hannah’s joke put a devilish thought in her head. “Maybe not,” she said, “but I’ve got an idea. You’ll like this.”
Cameron swallowed nervously. He was fairly sure that he wouldn’t like it one bit.
I won't be posting Part 10 today, but I PROMISE I will post it tomorrow.
