Executionus wrote:
How the Grouch stripped Christmas by Executionus
(This is a parody story I wanted to do because of a random inspiration brought on by the mindless boredom of work one day. It will be both sexy and hilarious. I apologize profusely to the memory of Dr. Seuss....)
Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas Carols a lot
But the Grouch who lived in downtown Whoville did not!
The teen Grouch hated his girl peers, and their blasted singing.
He cared not for mangers, snowmen, or even sleigh bells a-ringing.
It could be, perhaps, that their key was not right.
It could be that he was traumatized on a silent night.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his dick was two sizes too small.
But, whatever the reason, his dick or his past,
He wanted to end their songs, and end them fast!
"They're preparing the tree," he snarled with a sneer.
"Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!
And, tomorrow, I know all the Who girls and boys
Will wake bright and early, but not for their toys!
As the old wake the young and force us outside
For a fate of which we may neither run nor hide.
And then they'll do that which I hate most of all!
Every girl down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
They'll stand close together, with Christmas bells ringing.
They'll stand hand-in-hand, as those bitches start singing!
We boys are forced to watch as the girls stand on stage in the square,
And for a whole hour they'll scream and howl off key without care!
All the while our presents wait at home undisturbed
It is the most boring concert I've ever observed!
And they'll sing! And they'll sing!
And they'll SING! SING! SING! SING!"
And the more the Grouch thought of their inability to sing,
The more the Grouch thought, "I must stop this whole thing!
Why for seventeen years I've put up with it now!
I must stop the carols from coming! But how?"
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!
The Grouch got a wonderful, awful idea!
"They cannot perform without every single special gown.
Why, if they all turned up missing, the adults might shut it all down!"
So the Grouch made his plan to raid the girl's dorm for every dress
And not just their Christmas ones, but every garment in that mess.
For with nothing to wear, they'd never dare to sing bare
And at last those talentless girls would be out of his hair!
"I know just what to do!" The Grouch laughed 'till it hurt.
"I'll grab a quick Mrs Claus hat, wig, and a skirt."
And he chuckled, and clucked, "What a great genius trick!
With this skirt, wig, and hat, I'll look just like Miss Glick!"
"All I need is a lookout." The Grouch looked around.
But since it was past their curfew, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the Grouch? Hah! The Grouch simply said,
"It's freaking 2014, I'll text one instead!"
So he text his friend Max, who was a bit of a dog
A boy known to always think only with his log.
Then he loaded some bags and some old empty sacks
As he snuck out the back and he waved for Max.
All the girls were busy. No one knew he was there.
All the hotties were showering together before bed without care
Then he looked at the chimney, a rather tight squeeze.
So he said "Screw that!", and walked in the door with ease.
There was littered with stockings tossed high and low.
"These stockings," he grinned, "are the first things to go!"
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
Around the whole room, and he took every garment!
Pants, panties, push-ups and skirts!
Undies, outies, dresses and shirts!
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grouch and his guard,
Stuffed all the bags in a shopping cart like it wasn't even hard.
He cleaned out the bedrooms quick as a flash.
Why, that Grouch even took the last silky sash!
Then he stared toward the showers, imagining their scowls
If "Mrs Claus" ran in and stole all their towels!
Though funny or not, the Grouch chickened out
But as he began to leave, he heard a girl shout!
He turned around fast, saw a hottie just then
Little Cindy-Loose Who, who was a perfect damn ten!
Barely covered by towel, just standing there wet
The Grouch prayed it would fall so he could see her chest set!
She stared at the Grouch and said, "Misses Claus, why,
Why are you taking our clothes tonight? Why?"
But, you know, that old Grouch was so smart and so slick,
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
"Why, my sweet giggling fox," the fake Mrs Claus lied,
"I must get all of your laundry washed and dried
Before you all wake tomorrow and sing your first song."
While he stared, hiding the hardening of his dong.
So Cindy-Loose Who offered her help, you see
"These towels need it too, every one is so filthy!"
So she ran into the showers, and gathered them all quick
And handed them to the "woman" she thought was Miss Glick.
As the collection completed, she giggled one more time.
"The only one left to be washed is...mine!"
And with that off it went, placed in the sack,
Letting him see every inch of her pussy and rack.
She snickered and turned, skipped to bed, and bounced her rear.
This memory would jingle his bells for the whole rest of the year!
His loot all a-stuffed, and his breath finally caught,
He ran before more saw him and made this all be for naught.
The Grouch and Max ran straight to their beds.
Clothing bags hidden, dreams of quiet mornings in their heads.
When in morning they woke, the Grouch couldn't stop running.
"They're finding out now that no carols are coming!"
The girls are just waking up! I know just what they'll do!
They'll search for those pricey dresses for a minute or two
Then the teachers will get mad and scream "How could you?"
That's a song," grinned the Grouch, "that I simply must hear!"
So he and the other boys ran out hoping for quick presents this year.
And he did see a sight, which changed his whole attitude.
For ever single girl on campus was on stage covering in the nude!
The real Miss Glick, with rage in her eyes
Thought that all of their tales of lost clothes were just lies.
"Christmas is sacred, and so is our musical tradition
Try to skip out on singing, now you'll do it in THIS condition!
Now join hand-in hand, it's much too late to be shy.
You skanks are about to give quite a show to EVERY Whoville guy!"
The girls stood side-by-side, and they begged and they pleaded
To at least let them stay covered, but her patience was exceeded.
They screamed that it's cold, barely the morning sun in the sky.
But she just said "We live in the south, you ain't gonna die!"
They whined and they moaned, "Not our tits and our pussies!
Don't make us sing naked and flash them. No, oh please!!"
But Miss Glick believed in zero-tolerance, both here and in classes
"Grab your neighbor's hand NOW or I'll start busting some asses!"
So with shameful red faces, and no hope in sight
Every girl uncovered to grab their neighbor's hand tight
Every boob, every tit, every bush and every clit
Was bared to every male peer, who were having a fit!
Each girl's grip stopped her friends from covering a thing
And their torture just began. For the next hour, they must sing!
"Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays
Welcome Christmas! Come this way
Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays
Welcome Christmas, Christmas Day"
Every girl down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Was singing without any clothing at all!
He hadn't stopped the carols from coming! They came!
Somehow or other, they came just the same!
And the Grouch, with his brain somehow ignoring the show,
Stood puzzling and puzzling. "How could it be so?
It came without pantyhose! It came without
Executionus wrote:
How the Grouch stripped Christmas by Executionus
(This is a parody story I wanted to do because of a random inspiration brought on by the mindless boredom of work one day. It will be both sexy and hilarious. I apologize profusely to the memory of Dr. Seuss....)
Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas Carols a lot
But the Grouch who lived in downtown Whoville did not!
The teen Grouch hated his girl peers, and their blasted singing.
He cared not for mangers, snowmen, or even sleigh bells a-ringing.
It could be, perhaps, that their key was not right.
It could be that he was traumatized on a silent night.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his dick was two sizes too small.
But, whatever the reason, his dick or his past,
He wanted to end their songs, and end them fast!
"They're preparing the tree," he snarled with a sneer.
"Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!
And, tomorrow, I know all the Who girls and boys
Will wake bright and early, but not for their toys!
As the old wake the young and force us outside
For a fate of which we may neither run nor hide.
And then they'll do that which I hate most of all!
Every girl down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
They'll stand close together, with Christmas bells ringing.
They'll stand hand-in-hand, as those bitches start singing!
We boys are forced to watch as the girls stand on stage in the square,
And for a whole hour they'll scream and howl off key without care!
All the while our presents wait at home undisturbed
It is the most boring concert I've ever observed!
And they'll sing! And they'll sing!
And they'll SING! SING! SING! SING!"
And the more the Grouch thought of their inability to sing,
The more the Grouch thought, "I must stop this whole thing!
Why for seventeen years I've put up with it now!
I must stop the carols from coming! But how?"
Then he got an idea! An awful idea!
The Grouch got a wonderful, awful idea!
"They cannot perform without every single special gown.
Why, if they all turned up missing, the adults might shut it all down!"
So the Grouch made his plan to raid the girl's dorm for every dress
And not just their Christmas ones, but every garment in that mess.
For with nothing to wear, they'd never dare to sing bare
And at last those talentless girls would be out of his hair!
"I know just what to do!" The Grouch laughed 'till it hurt.
"I'll grab a quick Mrs Claus hat, wig, and a skirt."
And he chuckled, and clucked, "What a great genius trick!
With this skirt, wig, and hat, I'll look just like Miss Glick!"
"All I need is a lookout." The Grouch looked around.
But since it was past their curfew, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the Grouch? Hah! The Grouch simply said,
"It's freaking 2014, I'll text one instead!"
So he text his friend Max, who was a bit of a dog
A boy known to always think only with his log.
Then he loaded some bags and some old empty sacks
As he snuck out the back and he waved for Max.
All the girls were busy. No one knew he was there.
All the hotties were showering together before bed without care
Then he looked at the chimney, a rather tight squeeze.
So he said "Screw that!", and walked in the door with ease.
There was littered with stockings tossed high and low.
"These stockings," he grinned, "are the first things to go!"
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
Around the whole room, and he took every garment!
Pants, panties, push-ups and skirts!
Undies, outies, dresses and shirts!
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grouch and his guard,
Stuffed all the bags in a shopping cart like it wasn't even hard.
He cleaned out the bedrooms quick as a flash.
Why, that Grouch even took the last silky sash!
Then he stared toward the showers, imagining their scowls
If "Mrs Claus" ran in and stole all their towels!
Though funny or not, the Grouch chickened out
But as he began to leave, he heard a girl shout!
He turned around fast, saw a hottie just then
Little Cindy-Loose Who, who was a perfect damn ten!
Barely covered by towel, just standing there wet
The Grouch prayed it would fall so he could see her chest set!
She stared at the Grouch and said, "Misses Claus, why,
Why are you taking our clothes tonight? Why?"
But, you know, that old Grouch was so smart and so slick,
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
"Why, my sweet giggling fox," the fake Mrs Claus lied,
"I must get all of your laundry washed and dried
Before you all wake tomorrow and sing your first song."
While he stared, hiding the hardening of his dong.
So Cindy-Loose Who offered her help, you see
"These towels need it too, every one is so filthy!"
So she ran into the showers, and gathered them all quick
And handed them to the "woman" she thought was Miss Glick.
As the collection completed, she giggled one more time.
"The only one left to be washed is...mine!"
And with that off it went, placed in the sack,
Letting him see every inch of her pussy and rack.
She snickered and turned, skipped to bed, and bounced her rear.
This memory would jingle his bells for the whole rest of the year!
His loot all a-stuffed, and his breath finally caught,
He ran before more saw him and made this all be for naught.
The Grouch and Max ran straight to their beds.
Clothing bags hidden, dreams of quiet mornings in their heads.
When in morning they woke, the Grouch couldn't stop running.
"They're finding out now that no carols are coming!"
The girls are just waking up! I know just what they'll do!
They'll search for those pricey dresses for a minute or two
Then the teachers will get mad and scream "How could you?"
That's a song," grinned the Grouch, "that I simply must hear!"
So he and the other boys ran out hoping for quick presents this year.
And he did see a sight, which changed his whole attitude.
For ever single girl on campus was on stage covering in the nude!
The real Miss Glick, with rage in her eyes
Thought that all of their tales of lost clothes were just lies.
"Christmas is sacred, and so is our musical tradition
Try to skip out on singing, now you'll do it in THIS condition!
Now join hand-in hand, it's much too late to be shy.
You skanks are about to give quite a show to EVERY Whoville guy!"
The girls stood side-by-side, and they begged and they pleaded
To at least let them stay covered, but her patience was exceeded.
They screamed that it's cold, barely the morning sun in the sky.
But she just said "We live in the south, you ain't gonna die!"
They whined and they moaned, "Not our tits and our pussies!
Don't make us sing naked and flash them. No, oh please!!"
But Miss Glick believed in zero-tolerance, both here and in classes
"Grab your neighbor's hand NOW or I'll start busting some asses!"
So with shameful red faces, and no hope in sight
Every girl uncovered to grab their neighbor's hand tight
Every boob, every tit, every bush and every clit
Was bared to every male peer, who were having a fit!
Each girl's grip stopped her friends from covering a thing
And their torture just began. For the next hour, they must sing!
"Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays
Welcome Christmas! Come this way
Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays
Welcome Christmas, Christmas Day"
Every girl down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Was singing without any clothing at all!
He hadn't stopped the carols from coming! They came!
Somehow or other, they came just the same!
And the Grouch, with his brain somehow ignoring the show,
Stood puzzling and puzzling. "How could it be so?
It came without pantyhose! It came without furs!
It came without dresses, bras, or knickers!"
He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grouch thought of something he hadn't before.
Maybe carols, he thought, don't have to be a bore.
If every hottie, perhaps, has to show a little bit more!
And what happened then? Well, in Whoville they say
That the Grouch's small cock grew three sizes that day!
And then the true meaning of this moment came through,
And the Grouch saw the flashes of ten iPhones, plus two!
The boys recorded everything and took many-a-picture
Every phone type on Earth went off as they giggle and snicker
With Droid phone, Boy Phone, Toy Phone and King Phone
And even one poor loser taking pictures on a Bing Phone
And now that his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He jizzed with his load behind a tree to this sight.
He erupted like Mt. Vesuvius when finally he came.
Then he snuck the clothes back in, to give the girls all the blame.
When the singing was done, with humiliation and shame
All the girl ran home, save one who seemed game
Walking towards the Grouch was a nude Cindy-Loose Who
And she just giggled again and said "I know it was you!
Thanks for the hot morning. I hope you like what you see.
Late tonight come around to my dorm, and give your 'present' to me!"
With that she skipped back home, leaving a far less grouchy Grouch.
For after her roommates slept, he had sex with her on her couch.
She moaned and thrashed, and he knew for certain she wasn't faking.
And he learned the true meaning of Christmas...it's the taking!!
Anonymous wrote:
HAHA! by Anonymous
I LOVED IT!!!
Bunky wrote:
Cute by Bunky
Very cute Executionus guy
furs!
It came without dresses, bras, or knickers!"
He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grouch thought of something he hadn't before.
Maybe carols, he thought, don't have to be a bore.
If every hottie, perhaps, has to show a little bit more!
And what happened then? Well, in Whoville they say
That the Grouch's small cock grew three sizes that day!
And then the true meaning of this moment came through,
And the Grouch saw the flashes of ten iPhones, plus two!
The boys recorded everything and took many-a-picture
Every phone type on Earth went off as they giggle and snicker
With Droid phone, Boy Phone, Toy Phone and King Phone
And even one poor loser taking pictures on a Bing Phone
And now that his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He jizzed with his load behind a tree to this sight.
He erupted like Mt. Vesuvius when finally he came.
Then he snuck the clothes back in, to give the girls all the blame.
When the singing was done, with humiliation and shame
All the girl ran home, save one who seemed game
Walking towards the Grouch was a nude Cindy-Loose Who
And she just giggled again and said "I know it was you!
Thanks for the hot morning. I hope you like what you see.
Late tonight come around to my dorm, and give your 'present' to me!"
With that she skipped back home, leaving a far less grouchy Grouch.
For after her roommates slept, he had sex with her on her couch.
She moaned and thrashed, and he knew for certain she wasn't faking.
And he learned the true meaning of Christmas...it's the taking!!
