Revenge contest: Spoiled Goods [explicit content]

[mikewozere]

Mike and Sarah had no idea that their conversation was being overheard by Anna Jenkins, who was standing just the other side of the bookshelves as they talked honestly about their feelings for each other. Sarah, a class president, enjoyed helping out in the High School library a couple of times a week. Mike had finally summoned the courage to go and talk to her there after putting it off for weeks. "Just go and tell her you've always fancied her, and she'll break it off with Kyle, no doubt," his best friend Luke had assured him.

For a few minutes the two 15-year-olds just chatted about nothing in particular, before Mike finally steeled himself and asked the question he really wanted to: "So how come you started seeing Kyle, then?"

Sarah looked relieved that he'd finally brought up the subject. "Well, his friend Lee was dating Melanie, and she asked if I would go on a double date with Kyle. It sort of carried on from there; he just assumed we were a couple, and I suppose I just let him. Melanie and Lee broke up shortly after!"

"So do you fancy him?"

"Not really, no. In fact he's a bit of a jerk. And his friends." She suddenly looked very coy. "To be honest, I thought it might make you jealous too, and maybe remind you I won't wait for you forever."

"You... you mean if I asked you out you'd say yes?" Sarah didn't reply, but gave him a smile that said yes. The pair had known each other for years, and were neighbors. Their families were good friends too. Mike had always fancied her, but got tongue tied whenever he was in her company. "What about Kyle?"

"I was going to call it off this weekend anyway. It's his birthday soon, and he's got it in his head that we're going to go all the way then."

"So you two haven't, er, you know..."

"God, no. Only some kissing." This time it was Mike who was relieved.

"He's got the house to himself on Saturday, and wanted me to stay over. But I told him I wasn't ready for that yet, so he's invited some guys over to play video games. I'll drop in and call it off; he won't want to make a scene when others are around."

Mike looked pleased. "So... would you like to come round to mine on Sunday, and maybe we can go out?"

"I'd love to!" Sarah smiled. "Mel and I have been wondering if you'd ever get round to asking me out."

At this point Anna slipped away, grinning at the overheard conversation, and eager to pass on her juicy gossip to her cheerleader friends, and to Kyle himself!

Mike and Sarah exchanged a tentative, awkward kiss on the lips before he left her to her work and went to find his friend Luke to tell him all about his new relationship.

***

Mike was on cloud nine the rest of the week, and all Saturday morning wondered when Sarah would tell Kyle it was over. Luke called for him and they hung out in his room playing video games. Mike had told him about him and Sarah becoming an item as soon as she split with Kyle. "You two are made for one another," his friend remarked. "Kyle's a dick anyway. Don't know what she saw in him."

Lunchtime came and went, and just after 3pm Mike received a text message from a number he didn't recognise: "Hey, want to come and hang out at mine? Invited a few guys. Sarah is here but man she's wasted." He showed the text to Luke, and they both concluded it could only be Kyle. A second text confirmed this: "This is Kyle btw. Address is 6013 Pine View Dr. Come now, bring booze if you can!"

Mike was quite concerned by the 'wasted' phrase, as Sarah never drank. And what was she doing still hanging out with Kyle anyway?

***

The pair headed off straight away to the address in the text. Kyle answered the door. "Hey Mike, glad you could make it! You too Luke. Come on in," he beamed as he stood aside for his new guests to enter.

Mike was unnerved by the over-friendliness of Kyle; they were far from friends, and complete opposites in many respects. "Your text said Sarah was 'wasted'?" he queried as he and Luke stepped into the large hallway of Kyle's parents' impressive house. The TV could be heard from the living room, as well as various indistinct male voices.

"Ah yes, totally can't hold her booze, my girlfriend."

"But Sarah doesn't normally drink," Mike stated.

"What can I say? She was totally out of it after a couple of shots," Kyle continued as he led his guests into the living room where everyone else was gathered. "Guess she's just not used to alcohol." What he didn't tell them was that he'd actually spiked Sarah's soda with GHB, provided by his older brother, Brendan. Because Kyle had been prewarned, he'd managed to drug her before she got round to ending their relationship.

Mike and Luke followed Kyle into the living room and counted seven other boys (apart from Kyle), with two sitting in armchairs, three on the floor, and two sat in the middle and right-hand side of a three-seater black leather couch. At the left-hand side of the couch sat the only girl present: Sarah. She did indeed look 'wasted' - not tired, but sort of vacant.

But Sarah's cognitive state wasn't the only thing that Mike noticed immediately; her attire was very concerning too. She usually dressed quite conservatively, generally wearing a skirt, but always with colored leggings underneath, and invariably a buttoned blouse or sweater, depending on the weather. That day was pretty warm, so she was indeed wearing a white blouse with frills on its collar and cuffs, and she wore a short blue skirt. But the blouse had several buttons undone, revealing her modest cleavage and some of her white lacy bra. Also, there were no leggings underneath her skirt, so sitting propped-up against a couple of cushions at the end of the couch with her bare legs slightly parted revealed a lot of her tender thighs; Mike was sure that from the right angle (about where the boys on the floor were seated) her panties could surely be seen. She also had bare feet, with the sandals she had arrived in kicked underneath the couch.

"Hey, everyone, you all know Mike and Luke, don't you?" Kyle announced. Everyone acknowledged them, and they both half waved. Four of the boys were Kyle's close friends, including his best friend Lee (the only one of the group that Kyle had told of Sarah's plan to leave him for Mike). The other three were all from Mike's year at school, but like him, not the sort that he'd usually expect Kyle to hang out with - much too nerdy he'd have thought. And all in the presence of his soon-to-be girlfriend Sarah, looking like the school slut.

"Beer?" Lee asked, retrieving a couple of screw-top chilled beers from a cool box and pushing them into Mike and Luke's hands regardless.

"And you know my girlfriend, Sarah, don't you?" Kyle continued, squeezing himself between Sarah and his friend David on the couch. He placed his right hand on her left knee, and all the boys watched as it traveled a couple of inches upwards, over her soft, smooth skin, not quite up her skirt, but not far off. "Ah, bless her, she's totally out of it, aren't you sweet cheeks?" he teased, and ruffled her auburn, shoulder length hair.

"Say, are those her leggings?" Mike asked, having recognised the distinctive tartan pattern on the material in a heap next to the couch.

"Ah yes," Kyle replied, as David retrieved them, "Sarah felt really warm, so we helped her out of them, didn't we Lee?" Lee smirked as the friends playfully tossed the leggings to each other.

"Would you like me to walk you home Sarah?" Mike asked. "She lives near me, and looks like she could use some air," he explained. But Sarah just looked blankly at him.

"Nah, she's fine here," Kyle answered for her, "and my little sister is staying with a friend, so she can use her room." Mike did not like the idea of her staying the night there, but kept quiet. "Anyway, I've got some chores to do for my parents," Kyle said, jumping to his feet. "Won't take too long, so just chillax for a bit. Be right back." And with that he exited the living room via a door opposite the one his guests had used. However, he only half closed it, and listened from the other side while Lee led proceedings as they'd planned beforehand.

"Come and sit down here, you two." Lee suggested as he sat on the floor in front of the couch. With all of the seating already occupied, Mike and Luke complied. "Best place to check out Kyle's girlfriend!" he announced with a grin. Murmurs of agreement emanated from all of the boys, but particularly from the other two on the floor. Mike and Luke looked in Sarah's direction and, as Mike had suspected, were able to see straight up her skirt.

"Check out her pink panties!" Lee nudged Luke. All of the other boys wanted to see too, and crowded in front of Sarah to take a look. Kyle grinned as he watched the proceedings through the gap between the door and its frame.

Knowing how Mike felt about the girl they were ogling, Luke felt guilty about checking her out, but couldn't help himself. He made eye contact with his friend and just whispered: "You okay? What you going to do?"

Although Mike knew he should probably be jealous, and step in to somehow rescue her, he was actually turned-on by the whole situation, and was getting off by the other boys seeing his future girlfriend's underwear. All he could think of to whisper back was: "What can I do? She's Kyle's girlfriend, and there's more of them."

"She's so fucking hot!" one of Kyle's other friends commented.

"Is she high, or drunk?"' Mike ventured.

"I think she's stoned." one of the nerdy boys said, then added: "I'm going to get a photo. Don't tell Kyle, will you?" and proceeded to aim his cellphone in Sarah's direction.

"Good idea!" Lee said, and everyone else apart from Mike and Luke also followed suit and took out their cellphones. Very soon they all had at least one upskirt photo of Sarah. "You don't want a photo of that?" Lee asked Mike, grinning as he motioned towards the pleasing view between Sarah's legs.

"Er, sure." Mike replied, partly so he didn't stand out from others, so he could remain there with Sarah undercover, but also because he really wanted an upskirt of her (and thought it unfair if everyone else had one apart from him). Luke copied his friend, and captured his own voyeuristic photo of her. "So were you all here when Kyle took off her leggings? Wish I'd been here," he probed, playing along.

"Nah, she had bare legs when we got here," one of the boys replied, "but wish I had been too."

"Me and Kyle helped her out of them," said Lee. "That was hot!" he winked at Mike, enjoying toying with him.

"Did you get to see what's in her panties?" Mike just came out and asked what he really wanted to know. Everyone looked to Lee for his answer.

"Nah, just got to see them pink panties before you bunch."

"Shall we take a peek now?" David suggested, lustily looking at the slutty looking girl next to him as he reclaimed his seat on the couch. He gingerly touched the hem of her skirt, preparing to lift it up if the others agreed. But at that moment the front doorbell rang, and David removed his hand.

Kyle passed quickly through the living room to answer the door. "More guests!" he announced cheerfully as he went. Mike expected even more boys to appear to admire the view of Sarah's underwear, but when Kyle reappeared he declared: "We have more ladies," as four girls followed him into the room - fresh from cheerleader practice, and still in their costumes (being a cheerleader had never appealed to Sarah). One was Sarah's best friend Melanie, but with her were Freya and her two sidekicks, Anna and Jasmine; three girls Sarah would have crossed the road to avoid.

"Oh...my...God!" Freya screeched with delight as she spotted Sarah, and made a beeline for her. "Sarah's dressed like a hooker!" her two friends joined her in front of the couch.

"Wow, what a slut," Jasmine commented snidely.

"Hey, that's my girlfriend you're talking about." Kyle laughed good-humoredly.

"Enjoying the view there, boys?" Freya teased the five boys sitting on the floor. She was the only one of the girls who Kyle had let in on his plan to humiliate Sarah.

"Is she drunk?" Melanie asked her ex-boyfriend, Lee, appalled at the state her friend was in.

"Yep. Can't hold her drink," he lied.

"Girls," Kyle interjected. "Why don't you put Sarah to bed in Sophie's room? She's staying at a friend's tonight." This was of course part of the plan that only himself, Freya, and Lee knew about.

"Come on Sarah. We'll take good care of you," Freya said with a wink, as she and her two cronies pulled Sarah by her legs to the edge of the couch, pushing her skirt right up to her waist, revealing her panties entirely to the horny boys, amid whistles and cheers of delight.

"Oops!" Freya laughed, delighting in Sarah's humiliation. "Sorry, Kyle."

"That's okay," he grinned. His friends ribbed him about Sarah's exposure, not realizing that he'd instigated the whole thing. Meanwhile, the girls proceeded to get her to her feet and, with her skirt once again at a decent length, half walked/half carried her out of the living room towards the hallway. Melanie followed them, very concerned for her friend's dignity.

After closing the door behind them, there was much giggling, and after about a minute, Anna half opened the door and peered inside. "She won't be needing these," she exclaimed gleefully, producing Sarah's skirt and blouse. "Look after them, will you boys?" she said, and tossed the items into the middle of the room.

Mike was hugely turned-on knowing that Sarah was wearing only her underwear in Kyle's house with nine other boys, and thought it very likely some or all of them would get to see her - especially as she was in the hands of three of her enemies.

Girlish laughter continued behind Anna, and she glanced behind her. The boys, knowing Sarah was down to her underwear, were keen to see her, and the boys nearest the door tried to peer past Anna. Mike wasn't one of those boys, and wondered what they could see. He didn't have to wait for long, however, as Anna suddenly threw the door wide open to reveal to all of them the sight of Sarah wearing only her white bra and pale pink panties, being both supported and restrained by Freya and Janine, who had one of her arms around each of their necks.

"Anna, what the fuck?" Melanie chided her fellow cheerleader, and closed the door, to disappointed boos from the boys on the other side.

"Wow Kyle, I'm jealous," Lee declared. "She's gorgeous!" This was mainly for Mike's benefit of course.

"Yes, got a sweet body, hasn't she?" Kyle replied with a grin.

"Very fucking hot!" David agreed.

"Fuck me," Luke whispered hoarsely to Mike, "I've never even seen her legs without leggings on." He was clearly excited by the sight he'd just witnessed, and had a bulge in his shorts, as all of the boys did.

The boys listened intently from the living room as the girls continued to giggle and squeal in the hallway. They could hear Melanie trying to get them to stop whatever it was they were doing. They finally made their way up the stairs, making no less noise though.

"Shall we take a peek?" David asked, keen to see even more of Sarah.

"I think you've seen quite enough of my girlfriend already, mate!" Kyle laughed. "Who's up for watching a movie?" he asked as he sat down in an armchair, keen to maintain his apparent innocence at what was still planned for Sarah as punishment for dumping him. The others reluctantly complied, and they started to watch an old horror movie. The girls upstairs went very quiet for a while, and everyone wondered what they were doing.

"How long does it take to put someone to bed?" one boy asked after a couple of minutes.

As though in reply to the question, the boys heard footsteps on the stairs. Anna opened the living room door again and entered, grinning widely. "Look after these as well please," she snickered, producing Sarah's bra and panties from behind her back. She tossed the underwear on top of Sarah's skirt and blouse on the floor, then turned tail and skipped back out of the room, and upstairs.

The boys all looked in awe at the pile of clothing comprising every stitch that Sarah had been wearing when she arrived. Kyle picked up the bra and panties and dangled them using his index fingers and thumbs. "Well, it looks like Sarah's sleeping in the buff; I could be on a promise," he laughed.

Although Mike did find the idea of Sarah being naked a huge turn-on, he felt the situation was getting very much out of control.

More raised voices as well as laughter upstairs preceded another girl running down the stairs. This time it was Melanie, and she wasn't happy. "Kyle, Lee, you've got to do something," she implored. "Those bitches have stripped Sarah naked."

"We know," Lee replied, nodding at the pile of her clothes.

"Yes, but they're taking photos - naked photos of her," she complained, "and putting them on our group chat."

"Group chat?" Kyle repeated, very interested now. "Who else is in this group chat?"

"Just us, but you know how photos get shared around."

"I'll have to get me an invite to that group," he grinned. "Show me," and nodded to the cellphone Melanie was clutching in her right hand.

"Sarah wouldn't want anyone seeing them. Some are quite pornographic!" she said as she unlocked the phone and skimmed past several photos, holding it so that it couldn't be overlooked by any of the highly interested boys, who were all standing up by that point. "Here, look at this one, you can imagine what I'm covering," and placing her thumb over the middle of the lower part of her screen, turned it towards Kyle. He peered closely at the image of Sarah's naked lower half with her legs spread wide apart as she was held at waist height by two of the cheerleaders. Melanie's thumb obscured her obviously exposed crotch.

"Hold still," Kyle said, reaching out to steady her hand. But no sooner had he made contact with her hand than he snatched the cellphone clean off her.

"Hey, give that back NOW!" she cried, mortified that he had her unlocked cellphone with all those humiliating photos of her friend. She tried to grab it back, but Kyle kept it out of her reach, in the process offering his peers blurred glimpses of the explicit image of Sarah as he waved it above his head. Mike caught a brief sight of her pink legs in a V shape, with a darker area where they met. He knew Kyle was about to get an uncensored eyeful, and there was nothing he could do to stop him.

Keeping Melanie at arm's length, Kyle moved behind one of the armchairs and had a good look at the photo without being overlooked.

"Wow, yes, that's very pornographic!" he announced loudly. Luke shot Mike a concerned look, and now Mike really did feel the situation was out of control; with nude photos of his girlfriend circulating and being viewed by his adversary. But he didn't know what to do, so just copied what the others were doing - the others were baying to see the photo Kyle was examining.

"Come on Kyle, give us a quick look," David pleaded as Kyle hungrily swiped through the other photos on the group chat. "We won't tell, will we boys?" The others confirmed their agreement.

"Well..." Kyle teased, "okay, but just her bare ass, and just my main men," he indicated Lee and David. The others looked downhearted. "Sorry boys," he commiserated. Lee knelt on the armchair Kyle was standing behind, and David joined him behind it, and Kyle showed them a photo of Sarah, stark naked from behind, standing upright (but still being supported). Both boys loudly enthused at the view they were being treated to, however, Kyle deliberately didn't make too much of an effort to prevent the others from seeing the photo, and they all caught a glimpse of her fully exposed bare bottom. Desperate to stop the degrading photos of her friend being shown around, Melanie kept trying, unsuccessfully, to grab her cellphone back.

Kyle was about to treat his friends to more nude photos of Sarah when the other three cheerleaders burst into the room in a highly excited state. "You've got to come upstairs, we've got something to show you," Freya laughed, addressing Kyle himself, but then added, "Come on!" to the room in general, as the trio stood eagerly ready to lead the way. Melanie took advantage of the distraction to snatch her cellphone back out of Kyle's hand, and immediately locked it again to prevent further snooping.

"Is Sarah still naked?" Mike asked worriedly.

"Hope so!" David retorted.

"Don't worry, we've made Sarah's decent," Freya reassured Kyle, but gave him a sly wink that Mike noticed, and dreaded what they would find upstairs.

The boys didn't need asking twice, and moved as one towards the door. "Hey, me first," Kyle shouted. "My house, my girlfriend," and barged his way into the hallway ahead of everyone.

Freya, Anna and Jasmine ran up the stairs and stood waiting for the boys to catch up in front of the closed door to Kyle's little sister's bedroom. Mike and Luke were among the last to make it onto the staircase. One of the nerds, Owen, still had his cellphone in his hand. "I'm hoping to get an even better photo than this one," he commented to Mike as he held up the upskirt snap he'd taken. "And did you see her in her underwear?" Mike nodded. "And her ass?" Mike nodded again. "So hot!"

"We've put Sarah to bed, but as it's really warm, we've not covered her with a sheet," Jasmine explained, once all of the boys had caught them up.

"Instead," Anna added, "we've used stuff we found in Sophie's room."

"Sophie loves the sea - mermaids and shit, so..." said Freya.

"So we made her a bikini out of seashells!" Jasmine blurted out. She half opened the door to the little girl's room and glanced in, then pushed it fully open. The moderately sized room was indeed very underwater-themed, although mainly pink in color, but with lots of photos and paraphernalia relating to the Little Mermaid movie, and the ocean in general. The window was opposite the door, and the bed in the center of the left-hand wall.

The three girls entered first, obscuring the view of the bed from the horny boys who followed them inside. "No touching, boys," Freya warned. "Looking only!" The sight that awaited them was greeted by a collective gasp of excitement and appreciative murmurs.

Sarah was laid on her back on the bed (apparently asleep), with her arms at her sides, and her knees wide apart. For all intents and purposes she was naked, but had a small seashell covering each nipple of her modest breasts, and a small soft toy of the fish character, Flounder from the Little Mermaid, covered her slit, although the rest of her mons was clearly showing either side of the toy; some wisps of dark pubic hair protruded too.

The boys surrounded the bed, drinking in the sight of the barely covered girl; none of them had seen a girl in real life wearing so little before. Mike felt real jealousy now, as he watched every other boy (Luke too) point their cellphone at his near naked girlfriend-to-be.

"Well, do you like our home-made bikini?" Jasmine laughed, although it revealed much more than any bikini would. The girls had tried out various shells and objects before settling on those much smaller ones.

Only the shadow created by the toy fish obscured a more intimate (in fact positively indecent) view of Sarah between her parted thighs. This was realized quickly by a couple of the nerdy boys (including Owen), who turned on the flashlight on their cellphones and shone it up there, photographing what they saw - this was of course copied by the others, and soon all of Mike's school peers had much more revealing 'upskirt' photos of her than the ones taken in the living room.

Melanie joined everyone else in the room, and stood with her fellow cheerleader as the boys checked out her friend, powerless to preserve any of Sarah's dignity. However, the other three girls huddled for a short while before Freya announced: "Boys, our work here is done - byeee!" and left the males to their ogling, forcibly taking Melanie along with them, despite her protests. After leaving Kyle's house and walking to Jasmine's, Melanie tried to convince the other three cheerleaders to delete the photos of Sarah from their cellphones, but knew she'd never win.

After a couple of minutes of admiring and photographing the sexy, unconscious female, a noise coming from downstairs made Kyle's ears prick up. "Shhh. Quiet everyone," he ordered. Everyone fell silent, and several indistinct male voices could be heard downstairs. "Everybody, downstairs, NOW!" he barked, and the boys reluctantly moved towards the door. "Don't mention Sarah to my brother," he added.

Kyle was the first to re-enter the living room, where he found his brother and three friends opening a bottle of his beer each. "W...what are you doing back?" Kyle stammered; he was clearly scared of his older, gang member brother. "Thought you wasn't back till tomorrow?"

"Got me curious what you wanted that stuff for I got you," Brendan replied. He was clearly high, as were his friends.

"Oh, that was for someone else," Kyle lied. He'd gone as far as he dared in Sarah's exposure, and really didn't want his unstable brother involved too.

"Really? So what's these then?" and picked up the bundle of Sarah's clothing he'd draped over the back of an armchair. "Your panties, are they?" he asked, holding up Sarah's pink undergarment by its gusset. His friends found this hilarious.

By now the other boys had shuffled into the room and assembled behind and around Kyle. "They're Freya's clothes," Kyle said, thinking fast. "We took them out of her bag for a joke." Nobody contradicted Kyle's story.

"Really?" Brendan wasn't convinced. "Wotcha bin doin' upstairs?"

"Just hanging out in my room."

"Okay. Well we're just going to hang out in my room," he grinned, knowing full well Kyle was hiding someone up there. "Coming you lot?" he motioned to his dodgy looking friends.

Having seen Kyle try and fail to dissuade his big brother from discovering Sarah, Mike felt it was now up to him to step up and do something. "Wait!" he almost shouted, stopping Brendan and his friends in their tracks as they moved towards the door. "Sarah is actually MY girlfriend - she came here to call it off with Kyle, and has somehow ended up being stripped." This caused gasps and sniggers from his peers.

"You're welcome to her buddy," Kyle sneered. "She's spoiled goods."

"Well, whoever's girlfriend she is, let's go take a look!" Brendan said as he pushed Mike aside.

"No, stop!" Mike ordered with as much authority as he could muster, and grabbed hold of Brendan's leather jacket. A sharp punch to the stomach made Mike release his grip, and Brendan's friends pushed him to one side so they could pass. They'd reached the stairs by the time he'd made it through the doorway, and he knew there was no way of stopping them from seeing 'his' Sarah.

By the time Mike had scrambled upstairs as fast as he could (with his school peers close behind), Brendan and his gang had already located Sarah in his sister's room. "Fuck me!!" one of the gang exclaimed on seeing the near naked young girl; similar exclamations were made by the others.

By the time Mike reached the doorway, the gang was surrounding the bed. He entered the room and stood wondering what to do next. The others followed close behind, and the last one in closed the door behind them. Luke stood next to his friend for moral support, knowing they were hugely outnumbered. Mike hoped that fear of repercussions would mean that Sarah would remain unmolested, but the gang were pretty well stoned, and such considerations were pushed aside. "Get his cell," Brendan ordered Kyle and his friends.

"And Luke's," Lee suggested. "He's Mike's friend." Quickly both friends were restrained and deprived of their cellphones.

"Don't you dare touch her!" Mike ordered weakly, but a second later the shells and soft fish toy that had been preserving Sarah's last shred of modesty were tossed across the room, leaving Sarah fully exposed to the 14 males in the room with her. Appreciative murmurs emanated from the crowd as they drank in the sight of Sarah's private parts.

"Oh, we're not going to touch her, YOU are," Brendan replied as he beckoned Mike over to join him.

At first Mike refused, but it was made clear to him that the alternative was watching Brendan take her instead, so reluctantly Mike stripped from the waist down and positioned himself between Sarah's tender parted thighs. Even with an audience he quickly became rock hard. Being a virgin, he wasn't entirely sure what to do, but he nudged his helmet up against her delicate pink folds and pushed. The other boys cheered as they witnessed the couple lose their virginity to one another. They watched keenly from all angles as Mike's penis slipped in and out of Sarah's tight pussy. But it didn't take long before he came inside her, then withdrew and wiped their juices on the sheet. Their audience took one last look at Sarah's gaping vagina, with Mike's cum leaking out, then filed out of the room, chattering enthusiastically about what they'd just witnessed. The older boys were last to leave, and Luke was jostled out along with them.

Soon Mike was alone with Sarah in Kyle's sister's bedroom. He dismounted the bed, cleaned her as best he could with some tissues next to the bed, then closed her legs and covered her with the sheet. He realized that Brendan and his friends had deliberately implicated him in Sarah's debasement, knowing that he couldn't now report them to the police as he'd been the only one to "rape" her! He lay next to her for a while, wondering what to do. His cellphone had been left on the bedside table, and Luke, having had his own phone returned to him before being ejected from the house, texted him: "Can't believe what just happened. Will wait outside 4 u". Mike simply texted back "k", and finally he went downstairs to collect Sarah's clothes. Kyle and Brendan were the only ones still there.

"How's the lovely Sarah?" Brendan taunted Mike as he hunted for all of her clothing and underwear. Mike ignored him and, having located all of the items, ran back upstairs to dress his girlfriend.

"Give her one for me!" Kyle shouted after Mike. It took another ten minutes to dress Sarah, by which time she began to come around somewhat. Although still dazed and confused, he managed to get her to her feet, and helped her downstairs, then out through the front door. As promised, Luke was waiting for him outside, on the opposite side of the street. With Sarah's arms around the boys' shoulders, the trio headed for the nearby park to decide what to do, and what to tell Sarah once she was cognizant again.

[Executionus]

Awesome story! Good to see more entering the contest this month.

[Debbifan]

Enjoyed the first three quarters very much. Not so keen on the ending when the older brother turned up but that is just my personal preference for milder type stories and the criteria for the contest was to explore the darker side !

[jimmythehand]

Very well written piece. Similar to Debbiefan, the ending wasn't entirely to my taste but you can't like every part of every story and on the whole I enjoyed it. I'd suggest you add an extreme content tag to the title though, per the pinned thread at the top of the forum; it does seem to have decreased negative reactions to this type of content since the policy began.

Keep up the good work!

[Executionus]

I wasn't going to say anything earlier, but I join in the majority opinion on that. I think the problem with the end is that it wound up being a harsh tonal shift the instant the brother showed up (moving instantly from slow escalation, exposure, and teasing to suddenly rapid panic even from the guys). Then the final paragraphs spiraled much too quickly into the forced intercourse (which most readers frown upon as a concept to begin with, and should technically have a rape warning somewhere).

You may want to edit it or release a second version.

Had that part been replaced with more escalation from the girls and Kyle (with Melanie and Mike trying helplessly to prevent it) it would have been better. Just as some ideas, the girls playing a game where consistently smaller and smaller objects block Sarah's slit for the filming audience until it's just a shoelace, followed by a grand reveal when that too is pulled off. There is potential with a drugged girl for posing her body lewdly like a doll as well.

You could then keep with the guilted shame of Mike that you were going for by having all of the boys, Mike included, shower the girl in their seed before the final round of pictures. This would be more mainstreamly accepted in a story than a forced m/f penetration. You could even finish up with Mike forced to clean Sarah up before she wakes. The more I think about it, the more I like that ending because it fits with the overall theme of Mike pitifully going with the crowd and giving in to peer pressure as his g/f is humiliated in front of him. Mike's internal struggle and failure of character was one of the best parts of this story, because you could feel his mixture of shame and arousal.

Not really trying to take over the story or anything (which I enjoyed quite a bit), but redoing the final act however you choose to more closely match the rest would be a big benefit to it overall.

[mikewozere]

Thanks for all the feedback.
I've edited the title as suggested.
Yes I always have trouble finishing stories; I have a load still unfinished because I've lost interest and moved into new ones. Easily bored