I really enjoyed your story The Passion of Jessica Christ. One matter to consider, should you ever choose to return to the story, is the distinction between "Lady" and "Dame". A woman who marries a "knight" is referred to as a "lady". Women of independent achievement in the British system are elevated to the title "Dame".
I'd also consider altering the name "Joel", though I know why you've used it And perhaps editing out the reference to Johnny Depp, which hasn't aged well. I also seem to recall that Jessica's classmate isn't described before he makes his big appearance in the play.
Feel free to ban me
Personally I feel it went way too one sided and cfnm enm and sph in private school. Look at playville and camp there was a nice even cfnm cmnf enf enm but private. You start with girl forced naked but keeps her vagina covered. Then phones are taken. Yet you have her become the stripper assaulting boys and everyone taking pictures. Shouldn't in your world since she assaulted them she should then be publicly displayed on and spanked. Or her display fully unable to move. This is where I feel it was way to one sided you made her the bad guy. The Kaiba in Sao. If you do a girl displayed to show rules are applied equally it would be better. But as stands words say equal but in application they are not. Plus we all know girls won't get the pics off by the next day will they be punished? It's a lot of guys do it punished girls do it and crickets one sided that's why private in my opinion is the worst offender. Cfnm enm is fine if there is some cmnf enf also equal cmnf enf. Plus you write of little kids children being assaulted
Just read "Private School Privates". What an amazing piece of erotica. High school students disciplined in the most humiliating ways. The best being the stripping and displaying of the misguided females and males in front of their fellow students. I found it highly stimulating. Nice job, Executions.
Executionus wrote: Fri Sep 09, 2022 12:11 am
In the case of Playville I've also largely forgotten half of the characters and would need to relearn everything since it's been so long. I probably won't ever return to that series unless there winds up being a pretty large demand for it.
Not sure what counts as a pretty large demand, but I would like to throw in my vote. Dunno if you'll continue the series or not, but I can't give up hope - I love the series just too damned much
Executionus wrote: Fri Sep 09, 2022 12:11 am
In the case of Playville I've also largely forgotten half of the characters and would need to relearn everything since it's been so long. I probably won't ever return to that series unless there winds up being a pretty large demand for it.
Not sure what counts as a pretty large demand, but I would like to throw in my vote. Dunno if you'll continue the series or not, but I can't give up hope - I love the series just too damned much
Agreed. Literally my favorite series. Always wish there were more details of what went on in the lake. I'm sure there was some pretty kinky stuff.
Oddly I always figured the lake would be difficult to do much in the way of kinky scenes because it was constantly being watched by staff. That's why I had so many kinky scenes take place in the showers, woods, and the hidden pond while the open and public scenes were punishments delivered by the staff directly. Although there was definitely going to be girls getting their suits stolen and then marooned in the water once the planned boys vs girls strip war got under way.
Because of how much I had going on and how many characters I had present for that series it would probably be easier to write something new from scratch taking place at a summer camp as opposed to continuing a series I wrote well over a decade ago. That said, I don't have the empty time that I used to have. Maybe I'll get something small written up someday in order to have a new story again, but I'm 100% not doing any more large time-consuming projects like I used to do.
Executionus wrote: Mon Feb 24, 2025 5:16 am
That said, I don't have the empty time that I used to have. Maybe I'll get something small written up someday in order to have a new story again, but I'm 100% not doing any more large time-consuming projects like I used to do.
That's understandable. Looking forward to whatever new stories you come up with!
As for the unfinished finale to playville, I guess we'll just have to settle for letting our imaginations run wild
Executionus wrote: Mon Feb 24, 2025 5:16 am
Oddly I always figured the lake would be difficult to do much in the way of kinky scenes because it was constantly being watched by staff.
I mean after the virgin sacrifice when it was dark.
And perhaps editing out the reference to Johnny Depp, which hasn't aged well. I also seem to recall that Jessica's classmate isn't described before he makes his big appearance in the play. 
